大学  清洁工  问题少年  励志  奥斯卡最佳原创剧本奖  原版剧本  美国

　　WILL
　　All right， all right. We’’ll go.
　　
　　SKYLAR
　　When？
　　
　　WILL
　　Sometime. I don’’t know. Next week.
　　
　　SKYLAR
　　What if I said I wouldn’’t sleep with
　　you again until you let me meet your
　　friends？
　　
　　WILL
　　I’’d say……
　　（reaches for phone）
　　It’’s only four in the mornin’’， they’’re prob’’ly up.
　　
　　She laughs. Stops him.
　　
　　SKYLAR
　　You men are shameful. If you’’re not
　　thinking of your weiner then you’’re
　　acting on its behalf.
　　
　　WILL
　　Then on behalf of my weiner， I’’d like
　　to ask for an advance.
　　
　　CUT TO:
　　
　　INT. L STREET BAR & GRILLE -- LATER
　　
　　Skylar and Will sit together along with Will’’s gang. The boys
　　are considerably drunk， but it makes for good entertainment.
　　Everyone here is having fun including Sylar.
　　
　　MORGAN
　　Will， I can’’t believe you brought Skylar
　　here when we’’re all wrecked. What’’s
　　she gonna think about us？
　　
　　WILL
　　Yeah， Morgan. It’’s a real rarity that
　　we’’d be out drinkin’’.
　　
　　BILLY
　　I’’ve been shit faced for like two weeks.
　　
　　MORGAN
　　Oh great， tell her that! Now she really
　　thinks we’’re problem drinkers!
　　
　　CHUCKIE
　　Two weeks？ That’’s nothin’’. My Uncle
　　Marty？ Will knows him. That guy
　　fuckin’’ drinks like you’’ve never seen!
　　One night he was drivin’’ back to his
　　house on I-93-- Statie pulls him over.
　　
　　ALL
　　Oh shit.
　　
　　CHUCKIE
　　Guy’’s tryin’’ to walk the line--but he
　　can’’t even fuckin’’ stand up， and so my
　　uncle’’s gonna spend a night in jail.
　　Just then there’’s this fuckin’’ BOOM
　　like fifty yards down the road. Some
　　guy’’s car hit a tree.
　　
　　MORGAN
　　Some other guy？
　　
　　CHUCKIE
　　Yeah， he was probably drunker than my
　　Uncle， who fuckin’’ knows？ So the cop
　　goes "Stay here" And he goes runnin’’
　　down the highway to deal with the other
　　crash. So， my Uncle Marty’’s standin’’
　　on the side of the road for a little
　　while， and he’’s so fuckin’’ lit， that
　　he forgets what he’’s waitin’’ for. So
　　he goes， "Fuck it." He gets in his
　　car and drives home.
　　
　　MORGAN
　　Holy shit.
　　
　　CHUCKIE
　　So in the morning， there’’s a knock on
　　the door it’’s the Statie. So my Uncle’’s
　　like， "Is there a problem？" And the Statie’’s
　　like "I pulled you over and you took
　　off." And my Uncle’’s like "I never
　　seen you before in my life， I been
　　home all night with my kids." And
　　Statie’’s like "Let me get in your
　　garage!" So he’’s like "All right， fine."
　　He takes around the garage and opens
　　the door --and the Statie’’s cruiser is
　　in my Uncle’’s garage.
　　
　　ALL
　　No way! You’’re kiddin’’!
　　
　　CHUCKIE
　　No， he was so hammered that he drove
　　the police cruiser home. Fuckin’’ lights
　　and everything!
　　
　　MORGAN
　　Did your Uncle get arrested？
　　
　　CHUCKIE
　　The fuckin’’ Trooper was so embarrassed
　　he didn’’t do anything. The fuckin’’
　　guy had been drivin’’ around in my Uncle’’s
　　car all night lookin’’ for the house.